Duke Nukem Forever is a game that’s had a troubled history. It has had to contend with an extremely rough development timeline, one of the longest in video game history, the expectations of thousands of fans waiting for the game they’ve been promised so long ago, and even Duke’s own legacy to keep up with. It’s a miracle that the game is even seeing the light of day. After spending so long in development hell, everyone was expecting something new, something innovative, and something that would result in one of the greatest games ever. Unfortunately, even Duke Nukem apparently has his limitations.

On a technical side, it’s hard to really find a fault with the game. The controls are solid, the graphics are enticing, and monsters are especially gruesome to look at. True to the game’s heritage, there’s also a truckload of interactive items in the game world. Many of these interactions boost Duke’s health bar, while others serve as simple distractions. Duke is even his old self, shooting mutant pigs in the face and talking smack with an abundance of one-liners that he spouts when he gets a kill, though these tend to run their course fairly quickly. The game is also littered with pop culture and video game references that should be easy to spot if you haven’t been living under a rock for the past ten years, and Duke even takes a few jabs at some choice gaming icons.

The problem starts to become apparent after you delve into the gameplay. I didn’t particularly mind the regenerating health, though it did make some encounters stupidly simple, since the monster AI rarely chases you far. Nor was I terribly irked at being limited to two weapons, despite claims that the developers simply couldn’t find a way to implement a proper switching system to accommodate over a dozen weapon types. It’s really the fact that there isn’t a whole lot to go off of other than blowing a bunch of things up with a random sex joke here and there. And both of those tend to get old really fast.

Even the stages tend to fall into a fairly linear and predictable pattern: do some basic platforming, solve the occasional puzzle, and then go through a monster medley in order to continue on. After falling into this pattern several times, the experience tends to get tiresome, and there aren’t enough exploding body parts and scantily clad women to keep your attention. Boss battles don’t fare much better, as they all largely revolve around you running like a madman to let your health regenerate while abusing the unlimited ammo crates conveniently placed nearby, which allows you to plug a bunch of rockets into the ugly mo-fo’s face until it falls down. It’s really just an exercise in mediocrity.

Simply put, playing Duke Nukem Forever is roughly the equivalent of seeing a B-rated action flick; you don’t go for the story, because there pretty much isn’t one, or the spectacular acting, because there isn’t much to speak of outside of Duke’s own responses. You go to see an overly muscular guy shoot things, watch some pretty cool explosions, and maybe get an eyeful of T&A. The problem here is that the game doesn’t even supply enough of any of the above to fulfill the average male’s needs, which almost feels like false advertising.

Does all this make it a terrible game and worthy of all the scorn it has received? No. Does it bring anything innovative to the field? No. Is it fun? It can be. Is multiplayer fun? With beer and some buddies, sure. Was it worth waiting over a decade for? That’s debatable.